How To Stop Having A Favorite Person

Video How to Stop Having a Lover For those who don’t know, a crush, also known as FP, is one of us with borderline personality disorder described as the people we We depend on emotions. If you’ve ever had a crush, then you’ll understand that there are some incredibly difficult things about having a crush. depends on your interaction or absence from that person.first. Remember that they have a life outside of us. Chances are, your crush has other things they notice, busy with work, other friends, family, hobbies, perhaps a significant other, or they just don’t think about you as much as you do. think about them. With BPD, we tend to view others as if they don’t care about us or are cold because they don’t show the same level of intensity or emotional attachment that we do. When we have a crush, it tends to amplify this feature of BPD and our abandonment problem begins to show. Before long, you may feel like you’re slowly but surely pushing away your FP. it with them. We have to remind ourselves of these things when our loved ones seem to be ignoring us or enjoying their own lives. It is good to give our lovers the benefit of the doubt naturally, especially if our favorites are our close friends, important people or close colleagues. our. It can be difficult, but reminding ourselves that they are as human as anyone else can help us deal with the insecurities associated with our loved ones.2. Emotionally Dependent People with BPD are often emotionally dependent on the person they love, which has to do with how much they talk to that person a day, even if something seems to change in the way they do. Their FP says or whether they are aware of their favorite person’s actions. When something seems to have changed for someone we love, we often try to hide it so we don’t feel too insecure or clingy. However, we can eventually push the person away through passive-aggressive behavior and self-fulfill the prophecy that we are being abandoned. Sometimes, things aren’t as they seem and our favorites have to go through their own ups and downs too. The sudden change in their communication may really have nothing to do with us and so it helps us if we don’t jump to conclusions. Sometimes that may be the case, but a lot of the time, we ourselves are triggered by the problem of abandonment. can go through the roof and can feel like our world is ending. While it’s not our fault how we feel, we must also consider that it’s also unfair to place such a heavy responsibility on others for our happiness. This is why it is so helpful if we try to examine how we react to our perception that our loved ones are “shadowing” us or about to leave us. . You may feel as if you can’t help yourself because I feel like this so intensely. You can’t help how you feel, but you can deal with it in more effective ways, no matter how difficult it may seem. As stressful as it is, the reality is that our lives shouldn’t depend on other individuals. This overestimates our self-worth and places a heavy burden on another imperfect human. So it can feel like nothing can be done and we can only hide and brood from within. From the pedestal to the floor. Sometimes, those of us with BPD tend to idealize the person we love. They may be an angel these days, but as soon as something seems to start to change in them, we can start to panic that they might not be the perfect angel we created. out for them. Whether they forgot to say good morning, asked how you were feeling, or were simply very busy lately, all of these things can sometimes lead us to see these people as the complete opposite of how they are. we did before. Suddenly, we may think that they are evil, want to hurt us, never care, lack empathy and are not honest people. will hurt us now and again. On top of that, sometimes they don’t mean to hurt us and they don’t see things our way, because we have BPD. The truth is, most of the time, our favorite people are just as amazing as anyone else in the world, but because we attach ourselves to them, we tend to idealize them and consider them as your savior. We put them on a pedestal and when they show any sign of imperfection, it seems like our whole life is just a lie. The next time someone you love seems to be making a mistake, say to yourself, “You are an imperfect human being like me and many others.” Maybe that can help us. Looking too deeply into everything from reading every word of a text message, to scrolling through their social media and seeing them post online while they haven’t replied to your message – sign of a problem This neglect can affect our last nerve. conversations are different with people we’re not too attached to, sometimes we might think, “That person hates me” if they never respond, leave something via text message, or change their tone to us. However, it shows up much more often and we are much more annoyed when our favorite person behaves this way. It can feel like the end of the world. Literally: For example, one day, your crush might say, “good morning,” but the next day, they might not. When you have BPD, your brain can immediately start working and come up with all these scenarios of why, what will happen next, and why now you confirm that they has either hated you for a long time or is alienating you. , you’re first saying “good morning” to them to “check” if you’ve just made it to the top again, but they’re responding in a different way. You try to hold yourself together but your feelings are hurt, you’re fuming and saying to yourself, “I’ll distance myself from them before they completely shut me down.” Read more: how to use a crank puller So your crush ends up texting you, “What’s wrong?” and in your eyes, they are fickle and only text you because their other options are not available. You decide to ignore their messages and then you find out the next day, they wake up feeling sick and that’s why they’re not who they are. I really do. It’s a struggle for a lot of us, but one thing we can all do is close our text messages and stay away from our phones or social media when we start to find ourselves thinking too much about it. things like this.5. Feeling worthless after losing them. So many of us with BPD unwittingly put our entire self-worth into our relationships with someone we love, to the point that if we lose them, we’ll feel like we’ve lost our father. mother, sibling or a pet. So we try to do what we can to keep them from leaving, which sometimes pushes them away and causes them to leave. , you know how this feels. It’s one of the absolute worst feelings in the world to lose touch with someone you love. It feels like walking on the “Land of a Thousand Dao” – barefoot. You may feel a deep pain in your chest, feel lost, and don’t know what else to do. Losing people I love is a big part of why I’ve had suicidal thoughts in the past. We have chased away our favorites. Even if we don’t drive away our favorites, our worth shouldn’t go into others the way we place it on our favorites. Even though we know this, we still do it. I still find myself doing it. I think one way to help this is to remind yourself of your self-worth and practice self-care. I understand that this can also be extremely difficult. It’s hard to get a crush because as a person with BPD we are often aware of our own thoughts and how outrageous they are. So we always try to bite our tongue so as not to frighten our loved ones while at the same time, we often feel very strongly that they are not being honest with us or are being real. hide. The biggest challenge for me as someone with BPD. In the past, despite trying to moderate myself and share my opinions with you guys, I still haven’t found a comfortable way to process my emotions. I can’t give much advice as I’m in the same boat, but one thing I’ve found that works for me is to keep myself busy, avoid looking at the person’s social media, and try to make time for it. stay away from them for a while. Take a bath, go for a walk in nature, watch your favorite TV show, talk to someone who is kind and understanding to you, tell a therapist if you have one, listen to some music, live vicariously through your favorite movies, take an acting class. Do whatever you need to do to help yourself, but please don’t harm yourself and say negative things about yourself. I know. The least we can do is try. Read more: how to enlarge google sheets