How To Keep Your Opinions To Yourself

I have a disorder of the kind called “can’t keep my mouth shut”. If I think someone is being dishonest, or even if I strongly disagree with them, my arm goes up and my mouth closes, before my brain can calculate. damage may occur. Here to share what I’ve learned. Read: how to keep your opinions to yourself As a rule, if you persist in speaking your mind, you will inevitably find yourself in an environment where everyone hates you. Most people can’t process the truth (or what you believe to be the truth). And the more you throw it in their face, the easier it is for them to ignore you. You simply become who is always complaining. Your ideas will be defeated just because of the reputation that comes from the mouth. The trick to keeping your mouth shut is this: put your desire to make a positive change above your instinct to tell people they’re wrong. The latter almost never leads to the former. Back in my early days at Microsoft, I worked with strong teams where you were expected to have an opinion. If you see something stupid happen, you’re bound to raise your hand, say, “I think this is stupid and here’s why.” If you’re right, you’re welcome no matter how high-class the people in the room are. I argued with team managers, VPs, and many others who were much tougher, smarter than me. If I’m wrong, I get fired, but not scolded. I may have heard praises for being fearless. I have developed in this environment and think this is how the world works. But then, in a new job at Microsoft in a group called MSTE, I discovered another world. No one speaks their mind in public. Few people work hard or ask tough questions. Work quality and morale are low. I feel a responsibility to address these events as often and as loudly as possible with leadership. I even look forward to being rewarded for telling people how bad things are. Why don’t they want to hear this? I thought. Read more: How to make a roll of film with photos that guy. In my selfish view of life, the work around me lies beneath the bar. But I don’t stop to think that the group has its own bar, it’s its own culture and I’m not my job. And I’m far from getting enough respect from anyone to be considered a leader, which will force a culture change. It blew my mind to realize that there are other cultures at all. To achieve the same positive effects as my stubborn nature early in my career, I had to take a very different approach. I also realized that in the past, in other groups, progress happened not just because I was right and stood my ground (as much as my ego wished it were true). It happened because my boss, or his/her boss, listened to my opinion and acted, or granted me the right to do so. Having an idea doesn’t change anything unless someone with enough energy and genuine interest does something about it. Ideas are never enough. In the film Glengarry Glenn Ross, Blake (played by Alec Baldwin) gives perhaps the meager lecture of all time to a group of salespeople. Why is this lecture possible? Why didn’t they just ignore him or hit him? Is it Alec’s chin and slim figure? No, that’s because the owner of the company asked him to do it. He is allowed to open his mouth and speak a certain kind of truth, however it makes sense and unnecessarily contradicts it, because he has the support of those in power (You can watch this amazing scene here) here – NSFW). You can never successfully behave this way unless someone with more power than you allows you to do so.Read more: How to draw pebbles from boulders with Easy Step-by-Step Drawing Tutorials There is another scene in Glengarry Glen Ross where a salesman (in the film played by Al Pacino) screams at the sales manager row (played by Kevin Spacey), never opens his mouth until you know the shot. If you don’t know the angle, anything you say can ruin the plan (you can watch the scene here). No matter how right you are, if you care about the effect of change, you should never open your mouth without knowing who will agree with you and who will not. If you can predict angles and answers, and judge, even by guessing, if there is an 80%, 20% or 0% chance that anyone in good shape will follow you to support what you say, you know whether it’s worth it or not open your mouth. It’s a world of cognitive differences when someone respected says, after you say, “he might be right,” and when there’s just silence. And of course, in most cases, your percentage will increase if you raise your objections in private, rather than in a large meeting where the ego is being suppressed. threaten. week, in different cities and countries around the world. I depend on my ability to appreciate the culture I am in at all times. Of course there are times when the BS has piled up too high and you have to tell the truth regardless of the consequences. Forcing an issue may be the only way to get its attention. But choose your battle. If a year goes by and you still haven’t taken a stand, I can call you a coward (Nothing in 12 months is worth doing for your bad? You must draw your sword now and later. it’s to remind people that you have one). But if you take a daily stand, you’re either a glutton for punishment, an egoist, or too stupid to realize that you’re working for the wrong person. absolutely important and I’ll save it for another post. At work or at home? Read more: how to say good night in Polish | Top Q&A