Surround yourself with those who uplift you

Video Immerse yourself with people who lift you up“No one who is your friend demands your silence or denies your right to grow.” Reading: Surround yourself with people who support you― Alice the PedestrianI started college by saying goodbye to my father, sending a photo to my mother, and walking right up to Angell Hall to sign up for courses. I realized I wasn’t a bachelor at the College of Michigan nor was this the first time I actually came to the state a week ago. In addition, I missed the deadline (spring) and was treated as a transfer student. So it’s not just my first time getting this college grade, I’ve been surrounded by people who have done it before as well as a lot of people who don’t look like me. Thus began my journey to find my chosen family. Looking back, I feel like I went through a bunch of different groups of friends, many of which occurred due to proximity. They’ve all taught me so much, and I think it’s important to share those, especially because of the toxic as well as formative friendships I’ve gone through in and out of my personal experiences. Read more: Big Al is back on the baseball field, still hitting. dingers: ‘I’ve always been recognized’ When I look back on my college experience, a lot of emotions welled up inside of me. Through all kinds of emotions – whether I find myself relaxing with clenched fists, laughing until I burst into tears or holding back my exaggerated gaze – at the end of this roller coaster ride , I calmed down, relaxed and smiled at the thought of whom I shared these memories with. night walkers all over campus, lapses in judgments, concerts, rejection letters, acceptance letters, death, births and more. This piece is not a good story for all college sentiments. Instead of reflecting on everyone from the black/African women I call my mom/her/sister that I owe the whole world the kids of the Boarding College who taught me one or two things about myself and the people in between the people I love and adore me. return.1. Find you some people you want to see you grow on – I’ve seen too many people get hate because their friends are flourishing and they’re not. No matter how bad a day I am having, nothing makes me happier than when my friends play games. Like my freshman and sophomore roommates, Marjai used to say, “Girl, when you’re successful, we can all do it.”2. Find you some friends to show your love Love is a word with many meanings. Love for me is friends who spend many late nights helping me finish another semester of French. Love always allows me to do it the most on my birthday every year. Love is your biggest support and speaks your name even when it’s far away. Love is knowing that your friends will always support you because you’ve seen them visit anyone whether it’s on Facebook or at Necto. Love lives in a house that is always ready to hug you tight even after an argument. Love is knowing that I sleep with my phone loud so you know you always have someone you can call.3. Earn you some brutally honest friends – If someone can’t tell you your flannel doesn’t match the ’90s look you’re trying to wear, they’re not real. Such a hard truth to hear, but it has been very helpful. It made me re-evaluate the ways in which I used or didn’t use my privileges effectively. Calling each other in / out when we are fixed is very important. Sit down and work together to overcome our shortcomings, push ourselves to mature, become more cultured about our background to seeing the best in each other, which is friendship. Read more: LeBron James Dad A Man Named Anthony McClelland? An inquiry.4. Find you some friends who understand that you need to take care of yourself – #SelfCare means a lot of different things. From a trendy new hashtag to a deeper understanding of Audre Lorde. I have learned to respect the healthy ways in which a person takes care of themselves. In return, I learned to take care of myself. So thanks to the friends who taught me how to take time for myself, turn off all the lights, watch crappy TV with me, and thank the people who let me cook in their kitchens before I moved. out of the dormitory.5. Give you some friends who are oak trees – A woman once told me that there are two categories of friends. You have friends who are like paper and glass trees and you have friends who are like oak trees. She means, the first group of friends is fine when the days are bright and life is nothing but smiles. However, when the storm hits, their support is shattered, they are uprooted when you need them most firmly. However, friends who are oak trees are always by your side, supporting you, sheltering you when the storm comes. Not only do you need oak friends, you need to be oak friends, because let’s face it, no one likes a leech.6. Get you some friends…get you – Friends who take the time to get to know you and help you understand yourself. Friends you don’t feel embarrassed about are laughing all around and whimpering on their shoulder. Friends never had to explain themselves because they listened when you told them your deepest fears and motivations. People are your greatest allies just as you are theirs. Friends that received. Friend. Completely. Like. Friend. In essence, thank you to all of these friends my family has chosen. Whether we became best friends after one semester or our friendship grew stronger over the course of four years, thank you. Your friendship has strengthened my resilience and made navigating my identity as a woman of color on the University campus feel less daunting – you will forever held tightly in my heart. To whoever is reading this, whether it’s your first time in college or your senior year, I hope you can get a gold bonus out of it just as I hope you have or will make good friends who will surely never need your silence